Harsh Toke: Organizing My Books
 
Maus then Mann?
 
I’ve thought about alphabetizing the whole lot. By author, of course. I even started to once but I forgot about anthologies like Naughty Spanking Stories from A to Z or guides like The Well-Designed Mix Garden. To handle these properly, I'd need to go alpha by the editor. How would I find anything? Who the hell remembers an editor’s name?
 
And do you know how cool a line of Vintage paperbacks can look? All the spines are the same height and each has superb design with rich color and distinctive font. There’s nothing distinctive about an alphabetical row of disparate books with uneven spines. Books look better dumped into the middle of a floor. It’s probably easier to find Mickey Spillane novels that way, too. Just look for the babes.
 
But it’s not all the alphabet and aesthetics. I always spend too long thinking about my organizational schema. Should I use traditional genres or try something more personal? Where do I put Kant’s Prolegomena to Any Future Metaphysics? The Tao Te Ching? The Old Testament? Are they nonfiction, philosophy, religion? Folklore or self-help guides?
 
I don’t have this problem with my DVDs. They’re all the same size, except for those dumbass sets that fold out like car maps. Which, well, what th hell? I don’t want to think about driving anywhere when I’m getting ready to drink a Blue Moon and watch something by the Quay Brothers or John Waters. Damn, I hate even thinking about driving. Holding a paperback is better than holding a steering wheel any day--even if I don’t know where to shelve it.

--Stephen McClurg