In this ongoing series, punishment-glutton Jonathan Shipley chronicles his attempts to be rejected by America's finest publications.

Hello,

I hope things are going well. I've been a professional welder for eight years. They have been the best eight years of my life. There's nothing I like more than welding and there's no better magazine for welders like me than Welding and Cutting Magazine. Your story about spot welding underwater was great and your report on the brazing of galvanised sheets uing an arc was quite thoughtful.

That said, I've attached a story I hope you'll be able to use in a future issue of Welding and Cutting Magazine.

Thank you for your time and efforts. I look forward to hearing from you soon about this exciting opportunity to grace your fine magazine!

Jonathan Shipley
Vashon WA

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WELDING AND CUTTING SUBMISSION
By Jonathan Shipley

WELDING HAIKU POETRY

1)
You swell arc welder
Lift up that visor young man
Kiss me now, you fool

2)
Manual welding
Nonconsumable ‘lectrode
Gas tungsten is nice!

3)
Plasma arc welding
Concentrate GTAW
The arc of my heart

4)
Oxyfuel welding
Oxyacetylene, YEAH!
Kiss me now, you fool

5)
Spot welding is fun
Overlapping metal sheets
Zap! Two electrodes.
6)
Joints, joints, joints, joints, joints
Corner, edge, T-joint, lap and butt
After work, beer joint

7)

Kiss me now, you fool

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Their original response :

Jonathan

thank you very much for your kind words. We have plans to publish your letter and the poem in the next issue.

Greetings

Dietmar

Dipl.-Ing. Dietmar [REDACTED]

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My response to their response
Dear Dietmar [REDACTED],

This is wonderful! Thank you for the quick reply and thank you for publishing my welding-themed haiku poetry! There are two things in this world I love most - welding, and poetry.

Thanks again! Any chance I could get a copy of the publication once it prints? I'd like to show my friends in the welding business that I'm now a published poet!

Have a marvelous weekend.

Jonathan Shipley

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Jonathan Shipley
to Dietmar.[REDACTED].

Hello,

I hope things are going well. I noticed on your website that in the February issue of Welding and Cutting Magazine, under "Letters," you've included the welding haiku poems I wrote.

http://www.welding-and-cutting.info/

My question: Can I get a sample copy or two to share with friends and family? This is very exciting and I'm so pleased that, as a welder and a poet, I was able to find an outlet for my work!

Thank you a hundred times. You've made my day!

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Jonathan Shipley
to Dietmar.[REDACTED].

Hi Dietmar,

I hope things are going well. I just wanted to thank you personally for sending along the February issue of Welding & Cutting Magazine in the mail. I received it and, again, I appreciate it. What a fantastic publication! My welding friends were very happy in seeing it.

That said, I've attached another story that I hope you'll be able to use in a coming issue of Welding & Cutting. It's a joy writing for you all. Let me know if you'll be able to use it.

Thanks again, and be sure to have a marvelous weekend.

Jonathan Shipley

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WELDING & CUTTING SUBMISSION, by Jonathan Shipley

WELDING LIMERICKS

1)
There was a young welder named Jim
Who was both skinny and slim
He welded some metal
And when the spark settled
I hugged, cuddled, and kissed him
2)
There was a fabrication processor who did fabricate
He joined materials, thermoplastics, with much to elate
Good at his job
His boss was named Bob
Who took him for drinks after work, a date!

3)
There was a forge welder named Stan
Who was, for all who knew him, rather bland
‘Til he welded without mask
And got blind fast
And now he’s known as the White Stick Man

4)
A welder was welding under the water
He was welding there with his father
He lost oxygen
Floated with the bends
Now the father had only a daughter

5)
A gas tungsten arc welder named Clark
Was welding a broken bicycle at the park
The kids nearby
Well they all died
Because of the explosion of volatile sparks

6)
Using a plasma torch was Archibald McFuddle
He was working in a warehouse water puddle
He got electrocuted
He flew clear out of his booted
And so I hugged him, then kissed and cuddled