Coach’s Corner with Sven Swenson
Assistant Coach: Mark Kalar

Syndicated columnist Sven Swenson was head Cross Country Running and Track Coach at Minnesota State University from 1933-1998 where he coached several national champions and Olympic competitors. He is still Assistant Coach for the MSU Track distance squad and is very active in the Twin Cities running scene. Coach Swenson was recently named the coach least likely to retire – ever, under any circumstances– by Runner’s World.

S. Brown asks: Coach, I’ve been doing some 5- and 10Ks the past few years and have decided it’s time to set my sights on the Marathon. Do you have any tips or workouts that will increase my endurance? Much obliged.

Coach says: Endurance? “Endurance” is a word. It means nothing. You want to run longer? Farther? You want to get faster? Forget “endurance.” It’s all about strength. Strength of body. Strength of mind. Strength of will. To endure 26.2 miles of pain, you need to be able to grit your teeth and keep running. You need some gol-dang hair on your chest! This pre-workout workout will make you strong:

-Establish a 2-mile course, preferably on a hilly golf course (in the Twin Cities, Les Bolstad is the bee’s knees, Brownie).
-Set out the puke buckets every quarter mile.
-Run until you’ve used every gol-dang one of ‘em.
-Run the course again – faster.
-Now, start your workout.

L. Stevenson asks: Do you have any suggestions for good technical clothing to run through the winter? Specifically, for doing races in cold weather?

Coach says: Bill Bowerman, God rest his soul, doesn’t need any more of your money. Maybe if he had focused on the coaching instead of founding an athletic shoe empire, Steve Prefontaine would’ve come back from Munich with a gol-dang medal! Forget the Nike crap, Mr. GQ Smooth. Training in the winter is easy – layers of cotton. I like a nice big sweatshirt for the top layer. Now, racing is a whole different story. A singlet and shorts. If it’s sub-freezing, some runners I’ve had wanted to put on a cotton t-shirt under the singlet. I wanted to kick those guys right in the gol-dang teeth! A little Icy Hot on the small of the back – that’ll keep you nice and toasty. Now you can say nike, just like ol’ Phidippides, Mr. GQ, and that is smooth.

R. Thompson asks: I hate running in the cold, and treadmills are so boring. Do you have any cross-training suggestions?

Coach says: One thing I won’t suggest is shoveling the snow of your roof. I was doing this last weekend, slipped on some ice, and fell right off the gol-dang roof. I landed in some shrubs. Oh, it hurt so bad, Thompson. The wife doesn’t hear so good, so I ended up lying in the bushes for two hours before Dougie came home for a visit and saw me lying there. Uff-da! Boy, I damn near froze to death. No good, no good.

S. Solberg asks: How can improve my lactate threshold? I’m also concerned about my VO2 Max, I had it measured recently and it needs to be higher if I’m to meet my goals for 2005 and beyond.

Coach says: VO2 wha? Ah, I’m just yanking your chain, I know all about that happy crappy. Listen, though: less thinking, more running. This workout will make you fast:
- Establish a 12 mile course.
- Mark every mile with orange paint on trees or sidewalk.
(Alternate: set out puke buckets in lieu of painted marks.)
- Start run at 10k pace, or 6:00/mi, whichever is faster.
- Drop your pace 10 sec/mi each mile.
- If you can’t sustain the speed increases, run the course again until you can.

S. Flom asks: Based on your previous advice, I have been wearing cotton T-shirts on my long runs for marathon training. However, my nipples frequently bleed or at the very least become very sensitive. Help?

Coach says: First of all, I sense doubt in my advice. Who's the coach? Goddamn right I'm the coach! There are a number of proven ways to stop nipple chafing. If you're a wuss, there's Vaseline. If you're even more of a wuss, there are Band-Aids. Are you a wuss? You sound like you might be a wuss. No? OK. Are you ready to step up to the big boy table? What you need is some frickin' hair on your chest! Chest hair'll hold the T shirt away from the skin. I remember when Jimmy Boon started running with me he had nary a whisker on his chinny chin chin. By the time I was through with him he had a full beard and hair on his gol-dang chest. This workout will put hair on your chest:
- Run 4 min at 10k pace, or 5:30/mi, whichever is faster
- Run 1 min at recovery pace
- Run 3 min at 5k pace, or 5:00/mi, whichever is faster
- Run 30 sec at recovery pace
- Run 2 min like the hounds of H-E-double-L are nipping at your heels
- Run 15 sec at recovery pace
- Repeat until you're a man

Lesson's over. Now get out there and run 'til you crap yer frickin' liver out!